How to Stop Attracting Emotionally Unavailable People (The Truth You’re Avoiding)
Why you keep drawing in partners who can’t commit—and how to shift your energy to attract real love.
Read This Before You Begin
You don’t just happen to attract emotionally unavailable people.
There’s a reason—and it has everything to do with what you believe about love.
If you’re tired of falling for people who won’t commit, send mixed signals, or keep you guessing, it’s time for a wake-up call.
The real reason you keep attracting them (and how to break the cycle)
3 powerful shifts to change who and what you attract
How to recognize emotional unavailability before you get attached
Step 1: Own Your Attraction Patterns (It’s Not Random)
Emotionally unavailable people don’t just “show up” in your life—you allow them in.
Ask yourself:
Do you chase people who give you crumbs, hoping they’ll change?
Do you feel anxious when someone actually treats you right?
Do you ignore red flags because the chemistry is “too strong”?
New Rule: You don’t attract who you want—you attract what you tolerate.
Actionable Exercise: Write down the patterns in your last 3 relationships. What do they have in common? Awareness is your power.
Step 2: Change What You Accept (Raise Your Standards)
The people you attract are a reflection of what you believe you deserve.
If deep down, you don’t feel worthy of consistent, healthy love, you’ll settle for the illusion of it.
How to Raise Your Standards:
Stop chasing “potential” and accept what’s real.
Only invest in people who show up consistently.
Believe that you deserve more—and act like it.
New Rule: If you have to convince someone to choose you, they’re not for you.
Actionable Exercise: Make a list of bare minimum vs. true standards. If someone only meets the bare minimum, they don’t deserve your energy.
Step 3: Recognize Real Availability (Before You Get Attached)
Red flags are always there—you just have to see them.
Signs of Emotional Unavailability:
Hot & cold behavior (they pull you in, then push you away)
Avoids deep conversations or deflects when you express feelings
Makes excuses for why they “can’t” commit right now
New Rule: If someone wants to be with you, they’ll act like it. No mixed signals, no confusion.
Actionable Exercise: Next time you meet someone new, look at what they SHOW you, not what you hope they’ll become.
Final Words: You Deserve More—But You Have to Choose It
If you want real love, stop settling for its counterfeit. The love you accept is the love you believe you deserve. Choose better.
